Hurting teeth!

The thing is:
when u have so much going on ~ on the physical arena of life - that's when your mind plays up - you feel tired- you are inspired to clean your room and your teeth just hurt!

ahum! the thing about hurting teeth is - your entire focus is on not letting it drive u crazy!

unfortunately, thats precisely what it did to me today...as if it wasnt bad enought to be working on a saturday - with a teeth ache (coz many of 'em are hurting) - my productivity and efficiency has hit a new time low! notto mention i feel like yanking my teeth out - almost makes me wish i had dentures like my granma!

on this teeth crunching eve.....Aloha!

I will update this blog as the NEW and IMPROVED...read: older! and WISER ME!

need friend - wanna study

I: I am thinking of studying further
A: ok! have u thought what u want to do?
I: yeah, I have my course picked out - just dont know about the speacialisation....
A: oh, ok, so if u know what u want to do; then all u need is moral support...

Now, post this conversation with a very supportive (and cute) friend about my worries of persuing anything resembling books - stydying - exams !!!!- I am thinking - no 1 told me this was a support thing too - n that made so much sense... we always find it easier to achieve those personal goals in which we have a friend encouraging us from the sidelines - egging us on - believing that we can do it! so even when in fear and doubt - u call each other - over a telephone call get a shot of courage and get back on the proverbial horse - and manage somehow, perhaps just barely to MEET your goal.

so, if I do decide to persue further stydying in any area - part of my success strategy will be putting my friend support structure in place - before i begin - ensuring my ability to stick to my path even in tremelous times!!!

I dont want to wear my heart on my sleeve!

The thing about love - we girls - r in love with the idea of being in love... isnt that why its soo easy to build castles in the air!
this reminds me of uday chopra's role in Dhoom - just met the girl n already dreams of his marriage n babies!

I had my heart broken - once - I swore to myself I would never again give my heart to any1. but i am still in love with the idea of being in love - my heart is worn on my sleeve...still....silly, silly girl!

my friend's Roka ceremony

I attended 2 functions today. This post is about the second 1 - my friend's Roka ceremony.

She, my friend that is, is a pretty girl - today she has become beautiful (this is not about her oh-so-gorgeous saree or professional make-up!) - its almost as if some inner light (bulb?? tubelight??) has gone on in her - for the 1st time in a very long time - almost in forever - she has looked happy (in the child's artless innocence and joy genre) - almost as if - she can finally see her home! and knows she is about to reach the sweet haven of home and family!

I am glad that she has found her place - I think it is very important for each one of us to find that place or person who is our home!

May God Bless her and all my wandering soulful friends!

;)

n no, I have not been drinking! - hence, the label.

April

It has been a hectic 3 weeks for me.... was bossom buddies with frustration and exasperation and near hopelessness.

I have another 5 weeks to go before I can breathe easy - It's scary to be honest...even my mum worries if physically i can cope with such a demanding schedule... luckily she does not question by ability or intellect!

So, its rather interesting that i came across the quote on FEAR....

some more things i learned:

• you have to learn to say NO - I dont as yet, but i must begin - its a question of survival - you cant be what everyone else wants at the cost of losing out on things you want!
• I need my 8 hours of sleep, some peace n me time, some fun time
• My Diary - has helped me be organised and structured! - else in the clutter of my schedule i would have become synonymous with chaos!
• Not all opportunities need to be taken - some have to be left, some approached at a later stage when u can accomodate it better in the event that it takes off n is successful

Ramblings:

The new traffic rules are difficult - especially the no phone calls while driving!!! This law has pretty much brought my communication to a grinding halt!

right now, i have so many things on my platter, and not enough time to work on them in the manner i would prefer! what to do? what to do? how to manage all and do them justice too???

I await some insight! a light bulb moment!

Summers are here.... in the afternoons' when I return from work - even the poor a/c throws lukewarm air!

until later,

Summer is here... can spring be far behind :)

Quote on Fear

After a very long time, I took out the time (d only way really to find time) and browsed 1 of my favourite sites - Oprah.com... I came across this quote... and wanted to share it!

"I saw a great quote on a church sign about a year ago that has always stuck with me: Fear is a prison we make for ourselves. That is a truthful and powerful statement. Fear can hold us back from our dreams, and it is just an imaginary prison that we make for ourselves. Once you take the first step past it, though, you see it isn't so scary after all."

— judyanni

truly insignificant = bank loans

If you ever want to experience your true insignificance - try to get a loan to buy something which means something to you emotionally... the amount of stories ( u tell and r told!), documents required (almost as if you are going to run away with their ((india's?) money - leaving behind your home/job/family/friends....as if!!!)), interest rates (baba re! you would think the bank eats from the money interests generate!)...and the delays.... mid week the bank was off, the concerned people are in a meeting (??), their systems are down!!! so on and so forth....
I have now reached a point where:
1 - I have left it on God... if it is to be it shall be... else, its only photocopied papers!
2 - I will never get emotional about things UNTIL my loan is approved
3 - savings may be better utilised....let it sit in the bank and EARN interest instead!!!!

hmmm.... I am sure somewhere in all these lengthy processes, it is the customer who is supposed to benefit... as soon as i realise/ receive even an itsy bitsy benefit - I will definitely record it for posterity!!

on this hopeful note.... Good evening!

SHE [poem]

Posted on caferati on Jan 14, 2007.
my 1st poem for this year :)

The aftermath of watching the movie 'Blood Diamond'...

~~~~~SHE~~~~~

Where is she?
No no, not the limping one!
I want to meet the strong one
Strong of soul and spine
Strong of speech
Strong of stance
Who is this strung together with scotch tape?

~~~~~~~~~

cheers,
I

Thinking

Just when you have loads of material that you would like to think about - reflect upon - internalize and spew some poetry from - Wham!!! you are over loaded with work and a killer schedule.... thoughts??? I am not really sure what I am thinking these days ... my list of things to work thru is going up.... and i am afraid by the time i finally sit down the memories will be too far past and hazy for me to juice them for any revelations!!!!

Another trip I managed to do was to RISHIKESH - I went river rafting (yea yea, I am getting more adventerous with each season) - got dunked and then plunged into the ganges - now i know whats its like to feel your body freeze limb by limb - If I thought Delhi winters were freezing cold - now i have been disabused of such a notion!!!
It's b'ful offcourse - some of the pics are up on flickr...the rest will come next week...

oh yea - when i began the year i had begun to wonder if i was in too deep(offcourse i knew i would have to work hard and be really smart) but i was beginning to wonder whether i had overestimated my ability to cope .... In between I was almost sure i would take forever to pass the mark - but now I AM VERY PROUD to share that I received my CERTIFICATION - level 1 (duh!) and that too in the 1st attempt and within a month!!!! huff!!! Thank god!

now onto the next level ... here I come!

been extremely busy - It's kind of sweet for people wonder if i have disappeared - well. I havent I am just enjoying work - That's my official line for working long n odd hours :)
The saving grace - being able to smile and look into his eyes(however, occasionally)... my god, eyes are soo expressive - I guess so must mine be! if only now some good will come of it!

There are some v. intelligent people who write very interesting blogs - I have FINALLY updated the links from my blog to theirs...

:)

Music...

Some songs just speak to you at a very base level - Akon's 'I want to love you' with snoop is 1 such no. for me - and my very first download ever!!!!
and now this song has memories too :)

Another very interesting voice - Anastacia - definitely someone i would like to read about and hear more from....