waiting to exhale!

the image... suspended mid-air from a firm rope... paddling around trying to push back air n move forward!!!! FOOL!!!

how many full circles can 1 do? how many times can the same experience happen? what could i possibly not be learning?

where does the day go? and all those other days too? 24 hours of what? how many moments spent in living the hassles of others, and how many loving the weather? where do you go moment to moment?

some songs, like Karunesh's 'aao hazoor' has the most haunting melody and lovely instrumental .. and for those 7 minutes you can transport yourself to any place in the world... i do...everytime... and invariably go to the same place....!

quote i liked:

Perhaps imagination is only intelligence having fun. ~George Scialabra

mind blocks = fears frozes in our heads from past experiences which didnt quite work out as we had hoped...

and 2nd chances....do you/ we/ I still believe in them?

do you think i should just change the way i blog?

and this is it... crux of the matter... my mind (like this blog today) is all over the place.. and jumping from 1 to another non-related topic....and the link unclear!

perhaps...trow....

Life these days

How life gets crazier and crazier - its like a roller coaster ride!

16 & 17 Feb

I have had a busy weekend so far, and if it hadnt been for work today - I would have probably been out all day attenting programs... I realised, all these 'programs' have a purpose, message or some progress they are trying to establish, and so 1 must spend atleast a few thoughts reflecting on the event.... I will henceforth, attempt to THINK about the things i do, the places i go, the programs i watch - and observe my reflections! surely, there is much to be learnt from everything!!!

Even to dislike something or like something - to have an opinion - you must experience it - only then is your Opinion genuine & rightfully yours to share & not just based on hearsay!

15 Feb

I have observed & experienced - energy is a communicable disease!
I come into work all awake and see people sprawled on their chairs, and a few hours later thats the pose i am in too - - being around sleepy ppl makes me sleepy... even thought i have slept my whole 8 hours!

It is true, life passes you by while you are busy with meanigless tasks & obsessions.... we participate sometimes in conversations that lead no where, which are forgotten sooner than the echo of the last sentence!
We become so comfortable in the known that we dont even realise when we become boring...so when 1 is bored should'nt 1 be actually looking at branching out....

Note to self: Nothing will be served on a platter....silver or not!

looking at October

My mum keeps asking if i have met any1!!! I havent - the fact that I am not looking notwithstanding... and its confusing when you cant seperate some1 being friendly from some1 actually flirting. So, I stick to being friendly!

I think NY is like a layered cake! The experiences keep changing - every week i see more, understand more, my opinions change...its a roller coaster ride!
NJ is pleasant - its the sub lifestyle...
i love my life in India - coz i have the best of both world's - when I need the hustle bustle a'la NY - I step out n go shopping/ sightseeing/ partying with my friends... when i want suburbia - I stay at home, take a cup of tea, sit on my balcony - look at at the trees and the neighbors kids playing and reading intermittently...perhaps with some music playing in the background - sometimes just the local radio station! :)

My stay has extended than originally planned, and I dont know how to handle the cold winds... If i wear a coat - its too much, if i dont - its too less!

I did have BEER at OKTOBERFEST !!! :)

I have experienced (being the recipient off) first hand the difference between being friends with and being friendly - in this place, everyone is friendly and polite... and thats it.
I fear, we in delhi, are becoming like this too... more often than not i see people paying lip service and then going home and forgetting about it!

Definitely, the life is tougher here, I cant believe I spend 3 hours of my life every day in just travelling!
I see people here, older than my grandma, hopping onto the bus, walking the blocks, carrying their own (big) bags! The only thing my grandma carries is here tiny! bag with some cash and jewels!

I love the trees in autumn - they look gorgeous.
I like the fact that people leave at 6pm - sharp! long hours are not a sign of dedication... You get to keep your job anyway, even if you leave a little early - everyday! As LONG AS you finish your work!
and the option of choosing your shift - so there is an 8 to 4:30 pm shift... part of the reason i like my job back home - these are our timings - so even if i get stuck in a meeting - on a usualy day i can hope to get home by 5:30pm!

I had the most amazing weekend which i spent at my aunt's place - aunty and uncle are beautiful people - it was almost like sitting at the dining table with one's own parents...
I have never known a father, it is precious to me that uncle took the time out to have tea with me - talk about various things - ADVICE me... if i do well, they will not benefit! how selfless of them to be genuine... I may never be able to pay them back in kind!
Is this what it is like to have a dad? someone who doesnt let you take the bus coz its raining?

reality tv - cant watch it

Can you believe the CRAP these reality shows are?
n i only check 'em out to have an opinion - if i like i stay with em, but some...you HAVE to change the channel...for instance:
The Bachelor - one feels so sorry for these women - if this is true... and if it is staged - then i feel even more sorry for all of them... relationships are tough enough without national embarassment and disgrace!
and are they actually suggesting and showing the bachelor sleeping with the FINALISTS (reality anyone?) of the show... oh, thank god for the good 'ol fashioned saga of love and lust and batting eye lashes and blushes and dates and cakes...!

flash

sometimes, time isnt enough... can I afford to forget...should i move on - only to find i have set myself up again? for until i can forgive and trust again... chances will always have the same results...
sometimes, distance - time or space makes reality fade, the ugly truth takes on the sheen of healthy undercurrents... but, when I come face to face with the prince - he is still the ugly monster who wants to eat my heart for dessert (I am not even the main course!)...
....d story continues....

Updates...mid month-Sept

After the lights of NY...NJ seems alian... I mean NJ is quiter than even the outskirts of any of our cities...in almost all indian cities/towns and villages(here, i guess),in the evenings, you will always see some children playing, some people strolling out on the streets, you can hear people and families...here, by the time i come back - 8pm!!!! {what is 8pm i ask you?} there are some (read:2-3) people waiting for a bus into NY and ONLY cars on the streets rushing towards their destinations (offcourse, they ALL spare a cursory glance for me - which is a change, pleasant or not, from NY where people would go right through me if they could!...i wonder, what they must think of this woman carrying a back pack like a kid and a purse like a lady and standing at a gas station corner!)....I digress...time for a color change...NJ is a pleasant surprise...well, atleast the part i am in... and a b'ful name like meadowlands... oh, and today i made my 1st acquintance...with dr.s/proffs no less! and they looked just like normal ppl (this comment comes from my complete inaptitude at anything academic but a dream of being well read and an intellectual -- some day!)....

It has dawned on me:
--Fruits are also FOOD for vegetarians!
-- the commute is worth it for the scenic view :)
-- too much diet coke is STILL a lot of soda! and it causes a tummy upset!
-- I have no concept of $ (I u'stand Rs.100 vs. Rs. 10 but not $10 vs. $1.....)

My progress so far:
--I have understood the concept of uptown/downtown... and as long as i am in manhattan - i can get around! once i know the complete address that is!
-- I have found a good and economical b'fast place -- and which doesnt serve burnt coffee or bagels (unlike the deli next door to my previous hotel)
-- This city - like all others - has its good and bad.... the ugly -luckily i havent seen...(plz! say! tOUcH wOoD :)



Things which fascinate me/ make me want to jump off my yatra vahan (journey vehicle) and go CliCk....cLicK....cLICk.....:

a restaurant in central part with angel lights and lanters...MaGik...I did take pics - i just hope to come out as awesome as the experience

statue of liberty - saw it from the cruise ship... I want to go look closer... I am surprised i found such an overused piece of sculpture to be so fascinating!

homes done up for Halloween.. this is something i have never seen before...the houses look like homes... so comfortable and inviting...truly havens!
(tho' this does leave me wondering - if u r sitting inside yr house - how r u enjoying the garden/window display).... are these for us?
My commuting and travelling is so worth it... i am exploring parts of this city which as a tourist i wouldnt have...

I am very glad in this 1 trip i am getting to experience both lifestyles here in US -the madness of NY - the heart and pulse.... and the suburbs... both lives are so different...yet overlap...

i didnt think i would stay here so long... and I wonder if I have managed to cover a lot here or not! I definitely appreciate this place more each day... I like this place more than when i got here....now all i need is 10,000 - pick yr currency ($/Rs.) a few days off and i will get you reels and reels of AWESOME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

cheers,
I

world vision

...You may not be able to change the world...but you can change the world for 1 person...
~World Vision (donate.org)

supercalifragilisticexpialidocious

According to Wiki:
Roots of the word have been defined, as Richard Lederer writes in his book Crazy English as follows: super- "above," cali- "beauty," fragillistic- "delicate," expeali- "to atone," and docious- "educable," with the sum of these parts signifying roughly "Atoning for educatability through delicate beauty." This explication of its connotations suits the fictional character of Mary Poppins, in that she presents herself as both superlatively beautiful and also supremely intelligent and capable of great achievements. ....HUH!!!

Well, I knew I could not be in New York and not see a BROADWAY show... I mean these are the kind of things which become the highlights of a trip... make some of the most amazing memories of life... and was I right....so, I spend saturday - catching up on my sleep, then going on a nice bus tour of downtown (I think!) - I still have to do the other side - uptown!?

So, I went and saw 'MARY POPPINS' - its fabulous... I would recommned everyone to check it out atleast once.... I mean WOW! I didnt know theatre could be like this... I mean I have attended some theatre in Delhi, both professional and amateur... but I have seen nothing like this... the acting! the music! the songs - oh, b'ful, wonderful songs!... a spoonful of sugar anyone!
http://disney.go.com/theatre/marypoppins/

hmm... I also went to Madame Tussauds - freaky...glad I went once! oh, n did get a pic with Brad/Angeline!

saw the statue of liberty... definitely something u want to go visit - like a picnic trip - I do wish I'd had more time to spend looking at it... a very interesting piece of art... the movies never really prepare u for the real thing! v. b'ful experience! made me wish i had a zoom-in camera for some good shoots of the art work.

oh, HATE the FOOD here.... considering I am a foodie - this has been a nightmare... If I ever had any thoughts of someday in my remote future I might consider moving to US as a career move - I now dont see it happening... tho' never saw never n all... but it will have to be something VERY Irresistable!

Weather in NY is nice this time of the year - Its like a Bangalore summer... it still is... I like it... you can walk around without sweating like a pig.... oh, yea! n anyone can tell I am a tourist...I just stand on the sidewalks n stare at the architecture n shops windows around me....and I am sooo HAPPY to realise I can buy all these things back home... the only thing we dont have is a BROADWAY! but, then Dan's plays are excellent - so, maybe there is still hope for our city of djinns!!!

offcourse, the only ppl I do know in US are in Texas!!!! Could we still be any farther away! atleast, when u r in different continents u know its impossible... but when u r in the same country yet to be so far!!!! interesting... and irritating... and try explaining to your school friends why u cant just drop in for the weekend in tx from ny.... and u dont even want to go into your $ budget! d other school frnds r now in Canada... and offcourse, my 2.....2.... TWO.....!!!!Best Friends are in Delhi on the 1 weekend I am not there!
UNFAIr....unFAir....uNFaiR....

oh, I bought the latest O - Oprah magazine... a FIRST for me... I completely think this lady is awesome... I may not always agree with her views... but it doesnt stop me from appreciating strength of character and DISCIPLINE...which I sadly still lack....
another person who I find is fascinating is Alankrita.... the woman must have secret duracell batteries in her! how do u do a doctorate, work as a lowly worm in the labs, be a good student, a good wife and still find time to call a not-realy-as-yet-a-friend... and still retain humour and the time to blog and yes, read GAP coupons!... I mean...WOW.....do u sleep at all???

Shelly and Anubhuti and Shruti on the other hand have completely abandoned me.. they have disappeared... If u r reading this.... BOO!!!!

oh, WORK is GREAT as usual - completely over whelming, dry and boring... makes me wish I was a magician! a tap of my wand on the laptop... n voila! all reports complete! and PERFECT!

hahaaaaaaaaaaaaaa..... the highlight: a apple scented shampoo.... this is Life... humbling... humourous... it makes u laugh.. it sure makes u cry... and the end, u can only be thankful u r still human....